Sunday 24 January 2010

AUNTIE MAGGIES REMEDY

Now there’s all sorts of medicines that you can buy

No matter what ailment you’ve got

But I know a special one you ought to try

You’ll find it’s the best of the lot


It’s my Auntie Maggie’s home made remedy
it’s guaranteed never to fail

That’s the stuff that will do the trick

It’s sold at every chemist for "one and a kick".


Now if you’ve got lumbago, rheumatics or gout,

Or a pain in your Robert E. Lee

Don’t kick up a shindy,  you’ll never get windy
 
With my Auntie Maggie’s Remedy
If you set your alarm clock for eight in the morning

You’re bound to wake up I’ll agree

But I’ll bet you by heaven, you’ll wake up at seven

With my Auntie Maggie’s Remedy


In a young lady’s bedroom I went by mistake

My intentions were honest you see

She shouted with laughter, "I know what you’re after, 

it’s my Auntie Maggie’s Remedy."
Oh my Auntie Maggie’s home made remedy,


It’s guaranteed never to fail

That’s the stuff that will do the trick

It’s sold at every chemist for "one and a kick".


Now I went to a doctor, I wasn’t too well

And he made me lie on a settee
He said "There’s trouble brewing, you’ve been overdoing
Your Auntie Maggie’s Remedy."
Now I know a girl who was putting on weight,

In a spot where it just shouldn’t be

So I said to Nellie, "Now you rub your – ankle,

With Auntie Maggie’s Remedy."

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